Receive It Well!

There are seasons in life where we struggle with appreciation. Some Octobers can feel that way for pastors. Some years I weirdly hoped to get through without being “appreciated” on the platform in the services.

An interesting irony of our awkwardness is that when we most desire appreciation, we are also least comfortable receiving it. Reflecting on it now, I wonder what that reveals about our hearts.

We must remember that healthy relationships are two way streets. Sometimes as pastors we want to give, serve, help & lead  but struggle to receive from those in our spiritual family. That is not healthy. Genuine affection should be both given and received.

When receiving appreciation, I’ve learned to respond with some combination of the following depending on the circumstance:

·      Begin with a genuine “thank you.”

·      Acknowledge the blessing it is to receive it.

·      Express gratitude for their kindness & relationship with you.

·      Affirm gratitude to Jesus for His work in us all.

·      Express appreciation for the privilege of getting to serve WITH them.

Remember that Jesus himself allowed people to express appreciation to Him. At least two times he was extravagantly anointed with oil. Though others were provoked, Jesus was not weird about receiving appreciation. Neither was Paul. Philippians 4:10-20, in many ways shows us a principles for receiving appreciation well. (I know Paul is writing about financial support, but I think it is instructive to apply the principles here to receiving the emotional support of appreciation).

Here are a couple of observations from those verses that might help us receive appreciation well. I invite you to reflect on that paragraph in Philippians for yourself. I’d love to hear your best ideas for receiving appreciation well in the comments.

1. If we can be content without appreciation, then I believe we are more likely to be gracious receiving it! Maturity receives gratitude graciously without fishing for it!
2. Be grateful to Jesus when others show appreciation for you. Their gratitude is evidence of His love and work in them. That is something to celebrate!
3. Acknowledge the kindness of their appreciation. Immaturity measures the worldly value. Jesus’ calls us to value the heart.
4. Acknowledge your partnership in Jesus larger mission & Kingdom. You are not being appreciated for being better or bigger in any way. You are being loved in a specific moment by equally significant sibling in Jesus’ family .
5. Remember that the timing of everything we need including encouragement and appreciation is in God’s hands. He supplies it by His riches. He fills your heart so you can encourage others. He also fills theirs to encourage you! Receive what He supplies with humility and grace.

Pastor, I am thankful for you. I am thankful for Jesus work in you. I am thankful for Jesus work through you! May the grace and peace of His abiding presence fill your heart in this challenging season.